How to make your own toilet paper

Media over hype and government overreaction has killed the US economy.



Toilet paper is now as scarce as gold.



Because of the media hype shortage of toilet paper I present the following information.

How to Make Toilet Paper

Toilet paper is a resource that you may have but you will eventually run out.

Things You'll Need

• 8 large sheets of a liberal newspaper, 1/2-pound copy paper or non-glossy magazine pages
  
  
  
• Bucket or tub
  
  
  
• Water
  
  
  
• Large pot
  
  
  
• Leaves
  
  
  
• Grass
  
  
  
• Heating source (stovetop, open fire, propane burner)
  
  
  
• Spoon or ladle
  
  
  
• Baby oil
  
  
  
• 2 large bath towels
  
  
  
• Rolling pin
  
  
  
• Rubber mallet
  
  
  
• Wooden board
  
  
  
• Weights
  
  
  
• Scissors
  
  
  

Step 1

Soak
the paper in a bucket or a tub of water. This will help remove the ink
from the paper. Remove the paper after the ink appears to be 75 percent
gone.

Step 2

Place
the paper in a large pot with a couple of handfuls of leaves and grass.
This will help the paper fibers remain together. Fill the pot with
water so the paper is covered completely. Place the paper on a heating
element and let simmer for one hour. Do not boil at first so the dry
materials may absorb the water.

Step 3

Raise
the temperature on the heating element and bring the water to a boil.
Let the pot boil for 30 minutes. Add more water, if necessary. Remove
any foam with a spoon or ladle. The paper will turn into a pulp during
this process.

Step 4

Remove
from the heating element. Pour or ladle out as much water as possible
without disturbing the pulp. Wait for the water and pulp to cool before
removing the rest of the water. Do not let the pulp dry. Place the pulp
back into the pot after all of the water has been removed.

Step 5

Add 4 tablespoons of baby oil to the pulp. Mix with a spoon. This will prevent the paper from hardening.

Step 6

Spread
a towel onto a flat surface. Scoop out the pulp and place it onto the
towel. Press the pulp with a rolling pin to flatten and spread the pulp
into a thin layer. Use a rubber mallet to gently hammer any lumps.

Step 7

Place
a second towel on top of the pulp. Place a board on top of the towel.
Set heavy objects on top of the board to weigh it down. This will
squeeze out any excess water. Leave the weights on top of the pulp for
30 minutes.

Step 8

Remove
the weights and the board. Flip the towels upside down and remove the
bottom towel that is now on top. Place the other towel with the layer of
paper on it out in the sun to dry.

Step 9

Peel the dried paper from the towel and cut into strips.





Add essential oils to the pulp for a scented paper.







If you have an online subscription to a newspaper you will need to switch to home delivery.





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